I miss you the most.

There’s a twisting feeling in my heart as I wrap myself up tight in blankets, sandwiched between fluffy pillows, spooning and snuggling my lil pup. The thing I hate most about this feeling is I have felt it so many times before. But that never makes it any easier for me to feel. And it never makes it any easier for me to cope with. Or really just decipher why I feel the way that I feel. It makes my stomach acid feel like it’s boiling up my throat and then back down into my lungs, spreading like vapor across my veins, rising to the surface of my capillaries just to remind me of the depth of pain.

If time was a cure I would trust in it. I would sit and wait and be patient with time until all pain and all sadness simply vanished. As though pain is a programmed watch set to expire after three, five, ten years. I would wait half a lifetime for that to be true.